Monday, March 30, 2009
Also, my youngest son is going to his first concert. I purchased the tickets yesterday. I know he is over the moon (at 14) and will be seeing a few bands he likes, also bands that mom likes too so it will be a great experience for us. My dad took me to my first concert when I was in 8th grade, so I guess in a way I am continuing this tradition if you want to look at it that way. So in May he will experience his first concert!
I need to journal a bit more on my foods I have decided too (at least for a while) I notice that when the boys have chips or something I'm grabbing a few here and there and well I am starting to notice the bad habits sneaking back into my life, need to nix them before they start up in full force again.
Went to Kohls and Plato's yesterday, got some great clothes the boy and me. 6 pairs of jeans and 5 shirts and I only spent 80 bucks total. You can't beat that plus they are all name brands and in great shape. Also, got cute summer shoes at Kohl's and the boy got a new pair of sneaks, we spent almost that much just on those two items there!! But it was needed. I know he is happy and has new kix as he says. lol I say we had a great day and scored some major deals though!
Off to work, I'm late and procrastinating today, as I am sleepy and don't want to get ready but if I want to travel this year I need to get my butt in gear!!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
It's still cloudy and rainy here, but we were in such deficit of rain so far this year it is much needed. I am getting clothes done and want to check out the YMCA and see what the class schedule is like right now. I'm ready to get back into some formal exercise. I am meeting a friend for lunch who is passing through town on his way home today and just general things. I hope the sun comes out as promised and we do get up in the 60's later so I can walk!!!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
I am enjoying my new car, while waiting for the youngest's gf to come over last night we found out they were in an accident, it was horrible and we waited an 1 1/2 for them to drop her off due to the police taking their time to get there. Anyhow, I was one sleepy girl and late of course for my dinner with S, so our night got cut off short :( I have my plans an am flying down there for a long Easter weekend and we are going to San Antonio, I love that I am getting to do some traveling and seeing places I have never before, it is really great.
I am back on track with exercise, 4 nights this week....and I am very pleased with this. My jeans are getting a little loose too, so I am refirming up my body. I can't believe I let it go over the winter. So that is definitely a check to myself keep up on the exercise even when you DO NOT feel like doing it. I am going to get my butt back at the YMCA also, I haven't been since my hernia surgery. I was almost wondering if the workouts I used to do contributed to the hernia? I guess I will never truly know, anyhow I want to get my body and mind back on track and I am doing it one day at a time...
Enjoy the weekend I will
Thursday, March 26, 2009
I will all let you know how the weekend goes, he's in at 1pm tomorrow my time.....
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
you feel like everything is happening at once.. Ok that was my day today! I am over today....but tomorrow is a new day!
Friday is the best day this week as S is coming in to visit.
Plannin on a vacation with the boys this summer.
I enjoyed my cruise so much I want to share some great memories with my boys now!!!
I'm tired, yoga is done, no walking, eating ok better than ok and no drinks in quite a few days so I am back on track!!
I have more but that will wait as tonight I'm tired!!!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Of course today is like winter revisited here today, what else isn't new here in DE...but soon we will be all spring and then summer so I am excited....
This morning is chilly, back in the 20's I wish spring would just come and stay....I know soon enough it will be here full time. I can imagine what my desk at work is looking like and I am lollygagging getting ready so I need to get off this computer and get my butt in gear!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The boy was out too, playing basketball, and enjoying the day before he had to go to work. I'm glad I was feeling well enough to get out there....also all the cleaning is done and yoga (day 3) and tonight, I have a date. Yes, a real date, haven't been on one of them in quite a while so I figured it was time again. Meeting J at 6 and well we'll see.....
Today is going to be warmer, I'm going to try and get out there, I have been wanting to do some pictures for awhile now and the weather is changing and the buds are back on the trees, some flowers starting to bloom, so that is my goal today to become a wanderer and get outside!
Enjoy the day
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
Anyhow, happy Spring...I'm so glad it's here!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Me, I'm doing pretty good, the plans are in place for a lot of things going on in my life, I might have found a car, the trip to TX is still on just pushed back a few weeks :(, and my drinking, has ceased and deceased for a few days now. I had no immediate need to want to go out with the girls from work either yesterday, so I look at that as progress!! yeah me
Eating has been ok, not the best as I think the stress is causing me to not want to eat, or if I do as soon as I start I can't continue. I'm sure as things in my life level out so will this. Also, exercise is back on track. Got a 3+ mile walk in last night too, so I've been feeling stronger in that area of my life. Overall I give myself a thumbs up as work is in progress once again :)
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
My gf is maintaining on her own and well I'm feeling like blah.
I'm doing good with things, got to bed early but probably because I felt so sick.
I just don't have alot to say this morning but sure I will later tonight!
Sunday, March 15, 2009
"The question is not whether you love someone enough to die for them, the real question is do you love them enough to truly live."
"Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire."
and one of my favorites I read each morning:
"Life is too short to wake up ith regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it."
Enjoy, I just did...
Stability - the word for today on my gf's front....I hate it, I wish improvement were the word they spoke!
I have finished cleaning. I have cooked a healthy late lunch/early dinner. I have done my yoga. The weather sucks so I did not (or at least not yet) get in a walk, I actually wanted to take a nice walk to the Dollar Store, but I guess that will wait for another day.
I hate having no car, I hate having to wait on other's to help me out at their convenience. It's like being locked in a prison, oh and I find out today, no bus service on Sunday's. I know they need a day off, but I was going to venture to the mall...boo :(
So here I am, fighting off a nap because if I nap, I will be up all night. Tomorrow is a new day, and I will get up and exercise and not hit my alarm like 10 times and I will take charge of me and my life an get it back in order!
Anyhow, it's Sunday, gray and chilly. I am freezing again today. It's almost 11am and I am dragging get my butt in gear. I have a few more loads of wash, the boy wants to watch a movie and I MUST clean the bathroom, it's ewie!!!
I am leaving the drama of this weekend behind me. I will be calling the lawyer first thing tomorrow morning and see if there is some way we can put and end to this once and for all...I mean c'mon folks, it has been forever and I need some relief!
I am going to try and venture out today for a bit...we'll see how far I can get but I need to start walking, grey weather and all!
Saturday, March 14, 2009
So here I am, early on a cold, gray and going to be rainy Saturday morning. I want to work on the boy's room today, it will require a ton of cleaning out. I hope it will keep me occupied. I haven't had a drink either in a few nights, although after the whole thing yesterday it was very tempting!
I am ready for spring, warmer weather, and sunshine. I think the sunshine would be the thing that would really make me the happiest right now. Thank goodness spring is right around the corner for us.
Time for another cup of coffee, I will get my yoga done today and then start on the cleaning. I would love to watch a movie too, hopefully I won't get too sleepy and fall asleep during it...lol
Friday, March 13, 2009
Ok on a side note the ex....is grumbling, with another court ordered supeona(spellling here??) anyhow I don't know if I'm good or not but it has dashed my hopes (lawyer wise and their large fees) with a trip to Dallas and this all came after I thought I would be good to go....I AM PISSED AT THE EX ok I'm going to stop before this get's too out of hand. But what a way to start my weekend...thanks jerko!
Thursday, March 12, 2009
I have always been a true blogger about me, the raw honest truth, lately no matter how bad it has been
So we go forth tonight not knowing our following but guessing. loll wel willll have funn.........
But on the other hand, yes I think I am going away for my birthday, what a grand surprise, I will find out more details this weekend, as S is coming back to DE. He called me last night and surprised me with the itinerary....I am happy, I think it's a turning point on how I feel about R because he called too last night and asked me out for tonight, for a movie, I accepted but I didn't feel my heart was in it, S called and I was over the moon...hmmm see the pattern I am...lol
Ok, I'm late for work and of course they blocked blogger at work, I guess they think I am going to sit there all day and blog, who knows...lol
So for today, I am back on the wagon.........
thinking about what I to do this weekend..............
and hating that winter is back and the weather is colder again................
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
I hate this! I need need more control in my life....
Why would someone with so much before her become so.....easy.....
So more planning and packing and I'm gone to be flying the skies.....what a big year this starting out to be....
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
I have to get back into exercise and soon, my body is definitely missing my rollercoaster of up and down with getting the exercise in. I am committing or shall I say recommitting myself today to get it done! With the longer light in the evenings even a walk will be more than I have been doing!
I have to decide if and when I want to go to TX, last night S and I had a little talk about where this may or may not go. We both decided to let it ride it's course for now, but he did tell me he hopes it works out, he is very shy of his feelings since his divorce (his wife cheated and is still with said cheater) and it crushed him so...........he is nervous of driving me away, I told him I couldn't be further away from him, but I do love his company and well we need to take it slow!
Spring break is around the corner and I have to decide if the boy is going to his father's also, because at the end of the day it will be my responsibility to pay for this...jerko!
Also, I have to find a new car, one that preferrably runs at this point...I've found a few nice used ones the but the reports come back BAD!!! so I am still looking!!
That is it for me in my life right now, short and sweet!
Monday, March 09, 2009
I was exhausted yesterday, got the cleaning done, but not the shopping :( I just couldn't keep these eyes of mine open! lol Of course the changing of the time didn't help either with losing an hour of sleep.
Today, work, work, work....tonight, shopping. I want to be caught up, and time to start looking for good airfares.
I want to get back into a walking regimine too, now that the sun will be setting later and the temps are moderating, it's time to get back to the basics in that aspect....I love to walk, thank goodness...lol Yoga is still my favorite, but I need to add that cardio back in my routine.
I can't wait to see the buds on the trees and the little flowers peek their heads from the earth, I love spring and the renewal it brings with it too, a time to start over......
Sounds like the direction my life is taking right now, 2009 is turning into a new type of year for me.......
Sunday, March 08, 2009
On another note, for those who remember the old neighbor up here, well I text him today to see what is up, I still feel that we are not on the same page, so we all know what that means...WE aren't!!! I've been through this enough in the past year to recognize it, but I hold on to the fact that he is here and S is not, is that wrong, or right...I don't know, but what I do know from the few men I've dated they would do the same thing...sorry I don't mean to stereo type men but that is what I've been through.........so me and my smile are going to get my house cleaned up.....
I am happy, weight is down, smiles are up and life is good once again!!!
Friday, March 06, 2009
Thursday, March 05, 2009
I need to sleep and be well rested for the weekend!
If I am not around, I will update you all on Monday!!
Work is crazy busy, my coworker is out sick so that adds to my load, but it's all good. Yesterday they let one person go, it was shocking because first they sent her home for the day and at the end of the day, she was fired! WOW
I exercised last night, first time in a while, and I don't know why I don't more because it makes me feel good. I need to make this my addiction :)
Eating has been great it seems to be the one thing I'm good at controling these days, of course it was the one thing I never had control of before my surgery, it's strange how these things in life change. I also had no drinks for two days now...so in my eyes that is a celebration. Each day is it's own and I'm handling them this way. I figure if I don't bring it home then I'm good.....because it's always too cold to go out after I settle in..lol
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
So there is a dilemna....isn't there always!!!
The old neighbor, R as I like to refer to him....he has been a saint but a little bit disconnnected along the way. So I dont' feel so bad about the guy from the cruise, because truth be told he has a dating website page that he told me about that he checks too frequently for my liking...but anyhow.....so I am going to see where my mysterious cruise mate rates....is that wrong to list him that way, who cares and who knows anyhow.....I am hoping for a lot and I am thinking from a few short text we will be good.......
well we will see....I am excited...fighting a demon and all a the same time...
p.s. I don't want you all to think I have kicked this drinking thing....I haven't it's bad a I know and it serious but I haven't kicked it yet I'm working on it but daily there is a reason not to and of course there a million reasons that I should....talk to me people...all of you out there no matter if you have never talked to me before.....please all comments are considered to be good!
At least the weather is moderating a bit too, darn it's been cold with windchills below zero here...brrrr
So I have three more days and then we see......
stay tuned, I know I will be..lol
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Ok, for those who watch Oprah or whatever talk show gives the vice for WLS that has been me, I have succumbed to this bizzare reality and no I was in total denial doing so....here is my bad story.....
I have thought about this alot, during the last few months...ok it's been like 5...I work in an industry that is prone to drinking.....for those of you who don't know, drink is reality available...it's really bad.. anyhow. I have gotten in the rut of drinking things (concotions) I should not.....so the long story short yes I have replaced the eating addiction a new addiction to drinking. It started out as a harmless drink now and again, then it escalated into a few times a week, then the stress built and I noticed I would have at least 2 drinks per night, then a few more and so the rollercoaster ride began. Once I realized how much I was drinking on a daily basis I totally stepped back, it wasn't pretty, it was good and it's over (hopefully) for good. I do now and again indulge in one drink, and one is the limit. It's not everyday, it's not more than once a week and I make sure I think before I put that addiction into my mouth. So yes, I too have traded one addiction for another, now to be more conscious about everything, liquid or solid that goes into my body. It's a hard road and gives me a new respect for why it happens, not that I am condoning it, because I am certainly not, but it has been my reality.
We have gotten the largest supplier kicked off and back in our house last night, it has been an intense couple of weeks for me, working late and getting my part of it ready, now the real work begins!! I am excited and happy they are there and the forward motion of this line is going to be a perfect fit for us, great vision.
I am counting down the days till my friend gets here, yes I am that excited. After thinking about it some, we really did click and it's a shame we don't life in the same city, I think something could come of it if we did, with this distance, well who knows.....but I am going to enjoy it while I can.
Eating has been ok, Sat, was a bust as I was feeling like crap and Sunday I ate like a fat girl and paid for it Sunday night...yesterday back on track, no exercise at all which is bad and lots of standing last night makes for some achy legs today :( so I will take my whine and call it a blog
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Yesterday was a bust, I spent most of the day on the couch, napping and still got a full night of sleep, it was good. I feel a bit better today and have lots to do to get caught up on wash and cleaning. Of course tomorrow we have our big kickoff so I need to find something appropriate to wear! and it be versatile in the snow too! lol
My friend Susy wrote a blog last week about transfer addictions. This is something that comes up time and time again with WLS patients. Myself included has succumbed to this due to the fact that food is not our comfort in times of stress...I am not quite ready to put it all out there, but it's been on my mind, and to read her blog, well it has me thinking. I am getting closer, it's a tough love, to lose the food...almost like an alcholic or drug addict getting some help. It's a hard road and the decisions we chose are not always the healthiest for us! So not to be hiding behind the curtains (but I am for right now) I'm just going to have to think how I want to get this out there!