Friday, May 29, 2009

I am finally starting my weekend....

to finally start my weekend. I was at a viewing and service for a good friends mom who passed away earlier this week. It was a wonderful tribute to her, a woman who loved life more than anyone else I knew. She will be missed.

Now, I am out, to start my weekend, at yes 10pm....with my date. A fellow I have been seeing for a little now....it's purely hedoism between him and I now, ever since I first laid eyes on him. We have so much fun, laughing, joking and just having a great time together. I know what is going on...alot in my life. S and I well, there is alot to share, but I am not hanging out with him this weekend, nor any weekend probably soon. I have found some fun, he's a light in my day, a smile on my face and some lust in my heart. So with that I leave you, unknown to what is really going on, and yes I will explain soon! Have a great weekend!!! Enjoy and I will be back Sunday!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

I am glad this week is almost over



What else is there to say. It's been a trying week at work nonetheless, but I am always up for the game...lol It seem the busier we get the more responsibilities we incur...but there are only two of us and alas we cannot get it all done, ever! Someday, maybe, someone will understand this. I have spent a few early mornings at work trying to "catchup" but it seems to go unnoticed, maybe not, but I feel like I'm always behind.




Here are a few snaps of my new garden, it is progressing and seems to have taken!! My mom always said I have a green thumb and can grow anything, anywhere!
I have purchased a new piece of gym equipment, I cannot wait until it arrives, a new fitness regime for me, uncharted territories in my life, but hey I'm game....are you!!
Waiting on an awesome thunderstorm to arrive any minute, so I will make this brief...enjoy Friday, it's here already!!!






Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Hump Day

Can you say, three days left this week! I can, wow I love the short weeks. Work implemented a casual attire dress code for the summer. Let me tell you it was very easy to wake up yesterday and throw on jeans and a shirt and dash off to work. I felt so much more relaxed. This is gonna be a nice summer in that aspect!

Weekend, ended on tired note. Here I strived for a low key weekend and it was full of activities and fun and some thing I wanted to get done in the house. I have my garden planted, it looks great. The last two days have been cloudy and rainy so that will really help set those plants/bushes I planted. I need to go snap a pic of my creation. I love to work outside in the dirt, there is something very therapeutic about it.

Monday night we saw T3 - I enjoyed it and especially the person picked to play John Connor. I will say Christian Bale has had his deal with issues or whatever, but darn he is really some nice eye candy in the movie. He is busy it seems with quite a few movie projects right now.

I have some new things going on in my life right also, not quite ready to put them out there but there is smiles and fun on the horizon.....

more soon, sorry to be so cryptic

Monday, May 25, 2009

Monday, Monday

And I am home alone this a.m. In fact, I found myself without children for most of the weekend. I was invited to a BBQ yesterday, nice to always see the friends who didn't go to the beach! I also got to spend some time with a friend yesterday too, it was nice to hang out and catch up....

So this a.m. I'm doing coffee, relaxing and waiting for the boy to call so I can pick him up. I have flowers to finish planting and with the storms that rolled through last night the ground is in perfect condition for digging and planting today!! I will be outside, enjoying the last of the holiday weekend and life!! Hope you are too

Sunday, May 24, 2009

The middle of the long weekend

Woke up really early today, was able to get alot accomplished already since the oldest is working and the youngest is at a sleepover. The weather has been just perfect for this long holiday weekend, which is quite opposite of the norm for this holiday weekend. I need to get out and cut the grass, but I have no motivation right this moment so I thought I would pop in here! I have not gone anywhere or really made any plans as my June is going to be quite busy on most weekends, so mostly housework, working on my garden (I'm building up my backyard one) and just general hanging out and enjoying the down time.

School is almost over for the year for the youngest, graduating 8th grade in a few weeks and then he has his summer. I've noticed over the past month that he has contacted his father less and less. I'm sure partly is from the outcome of the custody battle that I won (which excludes his father from any custody) and his constant lying to the boy about what happened and why. It reall is a sad thing.

As for S and I, well we've had quite a long stretch now where we haven't seen one another. We worked through the issues of this, although maybe I'm not quite sure it's over (the issues that is), he is coming up the weekend of the 5th and I can say honestly I'm very glad he is. Although in the back of my mind I always wonder. We are heading down to Baltimore for this visit, another great city which he has never been to.

As for me, well I'm down 5 lb, been working out more, walking alot and just taking care of me! I'm officially 2 1/2 years out now and while it's not always easy, it is the path I've chosen. I think that my life would have been stuck in the same revolving pattern of discontent had I not chosen to do this. My health and wellbeing are intact and the head does seem to finally catch up with the rest of it, eventually. But I can honestly say some days I'm still a little taken aback by the changes that I've gone through.

Ok, before it gets too hot, I'm off to cut the lawn, good exercise!!

Enjoy the holiday and remember what this is about, those who fight or have fought for our country, the ones who take the lead and take care of us when the world is not quite right!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Life is never what you expect it to be....

or normal in my case for all that matters...

So last night S and I had a talk, it started as a text that turned into a phone call that ended in he can't deal with a long distance relationship. I was blindsided by this, so today I walked around numb, I'm still numb and maybe tomorrow will be a better day :(

No workout, not eating enough, and just general malaise on my part today.....geez pre-surgery, I would have headed for the Ice Cream section in the store and settled in with a spoon and 1/2 gallon...times have changed for me!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Mondays are hard enough when you go to bed on time.....

So yesterday I took my 15 year old, his gf and another friend of his to their first concert. The MMRBQ to be truthful, we saw 7 awesome bands who brought their game to this event. It ended up being cool, chilly and well not so May, but then again it was a perfect May here in the Delaware valley!! lol We got there right after the doors opened and from the word go had a great time. The second friend David brought his father actually had an affilation with the venue so he printed us (all four of us) out backstage passes to meet all the bands...OMG when I saw this I almost crashed the car...so we got to meet 5 of the 7 bands that were playing. When we got in they asked if us if we wanted pictures with the bands or autographs. After a short consideration I thought well I will take the autographs, because with the backstage pass it gave us backstage access to awesome pics!! So I came home with my beautiful jeans all signed by most members of the bands we met plus the radio station guys. We also were able to help out the boost mobile people with a pic of us in our shirts! :) Overall the day was awesome, my son got to game acoustically with Noodles of the Offspring and I think he is totally awestruck with that moment in his life for this minute!


So all in all his first concert experience was one of awe, inspiration for his guitar and overall a fun time had by all!!!


Here I leave with a shot of me, him and his gf......



Saturday, May 16, 2009

It's Saturday

Today I think turned out alot better than the weather people led us to believe. I got the grass cut, some weeding and other yard work done. Pedicure after, and I felt lovely!! The gym sent out their summer bulletin and YEAH the pool opens Sat for the summer season (sorry my Aussie friends :( ) anyhow, I know I will get alot of swimming in this summer. I got my yoga done, wash is almost done, and I feel well accomplished today!! that is a good thing!

Tomorrow we are off, the second sons first concert! I'm excited to take him to it and his gf. We will see the following bands, ZZTop, Saliva, Unloaded, Puddle of Mudd, Offspring, Hailstorm ( a local band) and Papa Roach. For a first concert it should be a mind blowing event for the youngster, of course I'm only interested in really only two of the bands!!! lol

I am glad I will be able to share this with him. When I was thinking back about my first concert, my dad took me to see Aerosmith, 78, awesome and yes I was the same age as my youngest...so that is cool!!!

Anyhow, my weekend is going along perfectly a nice night for some fun with family (my oldest is home for the next six weeks or so) and friends...which I will be meeting out later tonight for some dancing and fun!!! I hope you all are having a great weekend!

Friday, May 15, 2009

The date

If you can call it that, I went into it thinking no, not a date, we are friends. But as I was driving there that same thing overcame me again, that think that happens each time I see him.....and yes when I was sitting on the bench waiting and he pulled up, got out the car it happened again...DAMN I don't know, I guess it's a total physical attraction I have to him, good lord the butterflies were fighting to get out of my stomach!!

We had a great lunch, caught up, talked, laughed and just like no time had passed at all, but in fact I think it's like 8 or 9 months have!! Where do he and I go from here, well who knows....I guess we'll all just have to wait and see...he did ask me to the movies Tuesday night....hee hee

Enjoy this weekend, we are busy and that is whole different post....

Oh, proud to say weight is stable, although I have let my strictness slip a little....holding at 142 right now

Thursday, May 14, 2009

A walk on the wild side....

Ok, so here is the deal. I have been talking with an old bf, K for a month now, off and on, more off than on. So today he calls me at the end of the day, he wants to take me to lunch tomorrow. I get the butterflies, the same crazy feeling I had before. "What do I do?" this is what is going through my head as I need to have an answer. I agree, WHAT, I'm suprised at myself for this answer, but after some thought on the whole subject later this afternoon, I realized, there was never closure last year when things went sour, I am not sure if that is why I agreed, but we are having lunch tomorrow. Is that right? wrong? I have no flippin idea, but I am a little nervous about this, why? Seriously, why should I be, I have not a clue but I am....so tomorrow night stay tuned for the update, until then, I'm off to do some yoga and try to relax.

My neighbor has had us up most nights this week fighting with his gf, needless to say the cops have been here each and everyone of those nights, but it doesn't help my lack of sleep :(

So I'm off to finish out tonight, and await to see what happens tomorrow.........

Thank you Susy.....


For this award...yes I love to blog. Somedays I wonder why I still do but then the comments and help come rolling in during my times of need and not and it reminds me that I am not the only going through things.......
So here goes.....
* To seek the reasons why we all love blogging.* Put the award in one post as soon as you receive it.* Don't forget to mention the person who gives you the award.* Answer the awards question by writing the reason why you love blogging.* Tag and distribute the award to as many people as you like.* Don't forget to notify the award receivers and put their links in your post.
About me ~~ Well I started this blog on the premise of alot of my peers, to journal through my life before and after WLS, of course this blog like many has evolved into something more, it is not just WLS it is how my life has evolved, it's not always about WLS so much anymore, but the things that have happened since I had it and sometimes the deep dark secrets they forget to tell you (thanks doc). I have enjoyed being a part of Susy's life (Shrinking Susy) http://susy-abrandnewme.blogspot.com/2009/05/award.html and if you don't already pop in her blog and say hi. She is one of the luckiest people I have had the chance to meet, she has a great, loving husband and is a total success in life after WLS. Anyhow, my blog is continuing, I'm going to be three years out this Nov and my life has changed throughout this wild ride. Of course, I'm a single mom of two wonderful boys now, but it wasn't like that when I started. I have taken back control of a life that was out of control, both in my weight and in my marriage and the story unfolds (when I get a chance) of how and what I am doing now.....
Now I am going to tag these wonderful bloggers...because without them life would be boring....
Sunshine (Sunshine's Heart) http://sunshinesheart.blogspot.com/
Cindylou (My New life w/WLS) http://cindylou45.blogspot.com/
Janine (Journey to a Mini Me) http://journeytoaminime.blogspot.com/
There are so many more great blogs out there, but give these girls a look see, they are in all phases of the post op and such inspirations to us all!!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

I survived...

turning 45. Like I had a doubt. Of course my kids think I'm officially "old" now...geez thanks! Anyhow, my oldest took us to the movies last night, the new Star Trek movie. As we were leaving he hands me an envelope. Hmm, I wonder what could this be, so he says you need to open it now. I open it as we are leaving the movie theatre and what has he bought me? Well he purchased for his mother, a weekend away in Atlantic City with tix to a show. I had tears in my eyes. Not one ticket but two, so my S will be joining me too since they were in cohoots with this whole adventure. So in June, I will be spending a weekend down the NJ shore at a perfectly wonderful hotel and tix to the House of Blues!! He rocks!!! But it didn't end there, I had two dozen peach roses waiting at home from my S....I had the best birthday a girl could want...

Back to reality. Life is sweet right now, my neighbors kept me so awake way too late last night (they decided to start a fight at midnight as I was almost asleep) thanks....gee

So today at work I was dragging at best, I'm beat. Beyond belief. I wanted to say something to the neighbor about last night, but of course he is no where to be found! Gee wonder why....so I'm off to bed early, skipped the workout (no stamina) but the good news our pool opens this weekend, will the weather and us be ready, god probably not but it sounds so good right now!!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Beautiful Sunday

I had a nice Sunday, slept in (in fact did both Sat and Sun) which is unprecedented for me, I guess I am learning to relax and enjoy again. Of course the late nights helped too :)

Had a nice Mother's Day, the youngest cooked dinner, got me a beautiful hanging basket and we just spent a quiet day at home. I was given a memories rosebush also which I transplanted later in the day and spread some mulch. Overall not a stressful day at all. The oldest came home bearing a card (cute) and sunburn (ouch). He informed me the gifts come tonight. He is also taking us to see the new Star Trek movie tonight also!

Am trying to plan another adventure to NYC for the end of the month. The list of things to do and see is longer than the time we have alloted so I had to send an email and ask which is a must do for this trip and what can wait until another time! lol Hopefully enough can be striked and still be ok for this time....

Off to get ready to go to work, back to the grind so to speak.....

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Wonderful Saturday

I had a wonderful day, I was being an insomniac last night and sitting outside on the adirondack chair and enjoying a quiet beautiful evening and my oldest came home. Ok, it's like midnight at this point all. He came and sat with me and we had a nice talk, we sat and laughed and talked for about 1/2 hour, it was nice. Signs of what is to come when he moves on and comes to visit his mama.....He got us tix tonight to see XMen Wolverine, I liked it, David, well he thought it would be better, I don't know. Ok, so anyhow, my oldest informed me that since Sunday is Mother's Day and Monday is my birthday he would be home Monday to celebrate both with me. I know his reasons (his gf is getting ready to be gone for a month or two to Lebanon) and he is trying to spend alot of time with her and do things to hold them over until they can be together again. I think he's a sweet boy because he said, Mom, I love you but I need to spend time with her, do you understand this? Yes, I do. I remember being young and in love and thinking this is it. Who knows though, sometimes it still does work out and I really do like her alot!

So anyhow, I got my jungle (lawn) cut, good lord was that a feat and a half. I got a few flowers transplanted as I wanted to and then we went to the movies, brought home dinner and are spending a beautiful night home. I love to be home and enjoying the laughter and fun in the home. I will miss this when the kids grow up and move out though.

So, I am off, to declutter more, that is my thing right now, I'm trying to thin things out......

Happy Mother's Day to all my mom friends! I hope you enjoy your day and it is such a great thing to be a mom!

Friday, May 08, 2009

Yeah

It's the weekend, will be lowkey at home and enjoying time with at least one of the two boys. Seems the other has made other plans as he is evolving into manhood and has made other plans for Sunday...we'll see if he remembers that it's Mother's Day. Of course, he has always been a good son when it comes to occasions such as this.

S and I had another talk tonight, a good talk, so to say we are on a three year plan. 3 years being when my youngest graduates high school and will be intact with friends and such and then I can think more (well a little) about me...sounds selfish but it's a reality, I will always put my children first and to find someone who understands this is a very good thing. So I guess I will miss him alot during these three years but knowing there is an end in sight is more than anything else right now. I have had opportunities for more dates from here but seriously in the past month or so when I have taken them up on it, I always feel it's not right so that is telling me that S is right...I know three years sounds like alot of time, but the things we can do and the time we spend is more special and we truly will be taking it slow but in the long run I think this is a good thing!

So hopefully tomorrow it won't rain and I can cut my jungle of a lawn and get some flowers transplanted, other than that it appears it will be a low key weekend, which is not such a bad thing......

What is that in the sky????

Could it be a plane, rocket, alien spaceship? No, I believe I woke up today and when I looked outside I saw the SUN. Oh glorious sun I know you were up there, just not apparent to us. The news last night said we have had 9 straight days of rain. Talk about some soggy weather! I for one am glad to see the sun, I need it in my life....I know some are perfectly happy to have gray, rainy days but me, I need the warmth and glow the closest star to us emits!

It's Friday, for that too I am grateful, although today proves to be yet another rough day at work, we have two major meetings and I woke with a wee bit of a headache so I hope that it disappates prior to me having to be in there so I may think clearly. There is alot of changes going on at work, when I say alot, I mean ALOT, I think we are in jeopardy if not need to do our best right now, it's good changes but so much all at once is alot to remember and digest sometimes.

I am hoping for a drier weekend, I need to cut the grass. It's getting way to high, my backyard looks like a jungle and the water is lying so I know that will be a challenge. I want to plant some flowers and would love to pickup some baskets or something to spruce up the yard a bit!

S is coming soon, we talked about it last night. I am excited as always to see him...until then.....I am going to enjoy my weekend.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Today was just as challenging as yesterday

I just hope the doom and gloom that is my life lifts soon. I really am not liking the person I have been the past few days. What has brought this on, probably quite a few things, like the ex in town and driving me nuts; work being absolutely ridiculous about some things and then when in meeting after meeting they can't understand why nothing is getting done; the weather (enough said on that one); my emotional well being with my son right (but that will change once the ex is gone); the weather (ok the lack of sun is really getting me down); my finances; ok the list goes on and on and of course I could write a novel 400+ pages on this but I am going to stop right now.

So I went and got some artificial sun tonight (tanning), I talked to S shortly (there is another story behind that one), I made a great dinner for me the boy and his gf, and I finished the laundry that was building up. I want to have a drink and there is none in the house, so that is a VERY good thing right now because I'm too lazy to go out for one!!

I need to find some things around the house to distract me, again I'm thinking I should move out of this pot known as my home because it sux all the extra money I save just to keep up with it, but not sure that would cure my financial situation. I want a vacation (ok I know I had quite a few this year already) and I need some change in my life, something to look forward to again...

So with that I'm off to figure out some things and ponder my life, or read a book and fall asleep which ever comes first! HA HA

Will we ever see the sun again...........

I believe there is a sunny, bright globe in the sky that represents warmth and well Vitamin D. I miss it, I have not seen it here in the NE since before my weekend away :( and I don't think I will be seeing it until well Sunday...gah

I just get so sick of the clouds and rain and gray, maybe it's time to think AZ or NM? Somewhere dry and hot and well sunny......

So off for another day of gray clouds and the beginning of yet another chapter of my life, how do I feel......

like a 150 lb weight is lifted off from around my neck..............and that had nothing to do with the surgery

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Weekend and a start of a trying week

The weekend was good when I finally got moving in a forward destination. My plane was delayed 3 1/2 hours on Friday which led to a dinner cancellation and one very tired and worn out girl upon arrival. Luckily we found Chili's open and had a quick bite to eat at 11:30 pm, I was exhausted. I slept in on Saturday morning as we were only venturing down to Fort Worth for the day, so it was a lazy get ready when I feel like moving type of day. We had fun, although a huge thunderstorm came rolling in while we were there. That night we were able to get our dinner in and it was delicious!!!

Also, I got a chance to go to a new grocery store, Central Market. Oh how I wish there were some of these up here! I was like a kid in a candy store in there, it was absolutely amazing. I can't wait for my next trip down to visit again!!

Came home on time but to be awoken early in the morning on Monday with a mind bending migraine. I believe this is my third that has required me out of work for a day so the next one will require a call to the doctor for a med check on that one. Back to work today and a not so friendly visit to court to followup on my petition for full custody, it was a good news/bad news type of day. Good news - custody awarded Bad news - all back child support owed was dropped FOREVER! I knew not to count on it but geez.

So the ex came up for this grand event, he agreed in front of the judge to relinquish all rights, what type of person does this and the better question at this point is how could I have ever been married to this type of person. It makes me sad to realize that I never really knew what he was capable of. Amazingly so, it's a relief to be rid of him once and for all.....so another emotional trying day and a new beginning again for me.