Saturday, June 06, 2009

He's gone

for two weeks. I know, I know I haven't talked about it much and there is alot to much to share but I have been laying low with it all. Is that out of fear, not to jinx myself...I have flippin clue because truth be told I usually don't hold back on many things. So, if you have a few minutes or a half an hour I will catch you all up on what is really going on. What I have been sharing is the icing on the cake so to speak, but deep down there have been quite a few other things!

So first, S and I. We are officially done. We will remain friends and I think that for him it's healthy, I will admit it was bit of a blow to me. We talked alot at my last visit but talk is cheap when you live 1000 or whatever miles away and one of the two of us wants you there each and every night, starting now. With no guarantees, I was not willing to relocate my son the distance while he is getting ready to start high school and to have to leave all his it had been decided. It wasn't the best news to share, but it had to be done. I was a little heartbroken, but then again I think I have grown in so many ways that it's amazing. I have learned alot about myself and who I am and how strong of a person (women) I can be and I smile everytime I see her in the mirror! This has truly been a life altering relationship for me. I was willing to deal with the distance but he wasn't. At the end of the day I am a realist and that is what needed to be done, before the hardship and bitterness reared it's ugly head. So we still talk, he has alot of things to decide but I will always be a friend and there for him.

So I went to a bbq over Memorial Day weekend, I think I already blogged about this, but there was more that came out of it than I was ready to put out there at the time. There was a mutual friend of the hostess/host that came. I have known him probably about 5 years. Just a casual aquaintance until that night. I was in my girlfriends house getting ready to leave and this aquaintance came in and said to me I would like to walk you to your car. Ok, fine, not like we were in an unsafe neighborhood. So we went out to my car, he and I talked for about 1/2 hour outside (watching other guests he said to me, I want to ask you out on a date. I have known you when you were with the ex and all the crap he put me through, he said I have watched you date the rebound guys and see that you are finally settling into your skin and who you are. He said I always knew you were a great person and I want to see you as in dating. So we went on our first date the next night. It has been a whirlwind of dating and getting to really know one another since. He left this a.m. for two weeks away it is part of his job and I miss him already. Sounds silly but it is....

So a little catch up maybe not quite the length I want to explain right now, but it is out there...there are still quite a few other things we are dealing with and it's all good and I'm happy as is he so that is what counts!

No comments: