Emotional baggage sucks

I have been in an relationship with my husband for 17 years before it ended. He was a emotional abuser, he took great pleasure in bringing me down and laying me out all the time. I did alot of counseling to get myself out of that rut, but sometimes when certain things happen in my life I retreat back to the dark place I used to live in. Today is no exception, I went to bed last night and didn't even get out of the bed until 5pm today. I was depressed and felt like everything was spiraling out of control. So I did what I know how to do, shut down. I hate that I still allow myself this to happen but it does. I've been struggling for a few days now but I guess yesterday with something that didn't happen and did happen it just put it all out there and sent me over the edge. So tonight I'm up, I've showered and took the dog on a long, long walk and watched the sunset over the river, it was very therapeutic and tomorrow I want to have a better day!