Do you remember me..........

the one who became absent and then totally didn't blog now for over a month! That would be me, the girl who started this blog over 3 years ago and now has reduced her posting to FB!! gah!!

So here I am. Prodded by an email I received, but yes it was time to get back to my blog. Geez my summer flipflops are still my background and we have welcomed autumn into our lives here!

So where do I begin, who knows, so this may be scattered and fragmented....please bear with me.

In August, I went on vacation to the beach, ended up sick with strep and bronchitis. I was on meds for over two weeks and it took quite a while for recovery. I did heal only to find out that a position was never posted at work for a job I was hoping to apply for. They brought someone in the from the outside and well realistically my life has turned upside down. I was bitter and angry about this for a while, but I am moving past that now.

My boys have both celebrated another year of life this month! I am so proud of both of them and they are growing up to be fine young men.

My youngest has entered high school, he loves it! He loves his classes and all the new and old friends he has there!

I have met a new guy, he's a keeper, we are having a great time, and I enjoy being with him alot! We get to spend time together when we can because of our schedules, but they are quality time.

Have taken some other vacation time off also, days here and there, clearing out my house. I think I need to sell and move on at this point because its getting too much for me to handle the things that are going on with it. But then again, I am not sure I will be able to sell for a fair price, so I have been doing some homework on that.

Lastly, I have a UTI this week which comes with complications, so I am once again recovering. I have found that with the WLS and illness (other than common colds) I seem to be sicker than normal, not sure if it related, but I will say it has crossed my mind more than once this past year. I have broached this with the doctor and he is monitoring this so we'll see.....

with this I hope to be in here more often, it's Thursday almost the weekend and I can't wait till 5pm tomorrow! lol

Neglected

That is the only word I can think that this blog thinks at this particular moment! Me, on the other hand, overly busy.

I am single as the day is long, that is a new statement in my vocabulary, but one that I must adhere by to get myself through the days and weeks ahead, because we have a new acquisition and it positions me to catapult my career into the place I want to be....so I need to focus! I have been working longer than normal days, much to the dismay of my younger son. I have been absent from homelife all around for a bit, because I lack the energy to do anything but cook a good meal once I get home, but the reward will be threefold to me, my family and my career. In a day and age where most people are losing jobs, I have this opportunity to catapult mine and I am going to do everything I can to do this, I am a very motivated person and I would love to see my self succeed at this! Ok, enough gloating about me!

My son is down to a mechanical prosthetis...ok that may not be exactly the right way to put that but the cast is off, he has a uber cool brace on his leg and is able to enjoy the rest of his summer, swimming included!! He has recovered so well, I'm very proud of him, but worry that his enthusiam will reinjure himself!

Me, I am maintaining, a grand 136 today....I hardly look at the scale anymore and I am still doing my slim in 6...it is really a great, sweaty, EASY workout but she kicks your ass and you feel it the next day....my clothes are fitting better once again and I feel better about myself...ok that is really a crazy thing to say because in my past life I would never have said that...lol

I am working too many hours though and they are really taking their toll, I want to get into the Inventory Mgmt field and this is my opportunity so I am going to ride it out and see what happens. What I have found out though is I have so many friends in the industry along with my personal friends who think I am doing a great job, well balanced is the word I hear alot...although I don't always feel that way, I am glad it is all coming down to that!! so please between you and me let them think that for now!

What else, I have no clue...I just passed my 32 months out since surgery....does that even calculate with you because it seems like a distant dream to me....today at work I wore a size 6 suit, very finely tailored that I picked up at a second hand store....with a smart shirt for our meetings all day...and I felt like more than a million bucks...no wonder I always envied the skinnier girls in the past for their choice of fashion because today totally suited me!! ok no pun intended... I had a old friend/supplier rep come in, he has not seen me in person since the transformation so to speak, he was in awe, same age and he was like you are gorgeous!! talk about some comments that make your day, especially since it was bound to be stressful.

Anyhow, enough of me, life is grand, we are spending all weekends from now til the end of Oct at the beach...and I say AMEN to that, coffee and peace and silence with my poochy (cole) on the beach at 6am and I am a happy girl!!

So in essence I am not dating, so if you followed for that give it up...lol because I have! well for a while at least and I'm leading the boring life for a spell.

Neglected? does this mean I am out there living my life and have no time for my cyber friends.....if so I mean no harm because I love you all, but life is good right now!

No more

dating for me for quite a while. Last night was such an eye opening experience of how one person who you think maybe you might a small clue about shows you that you really have no clue at all. He never called, text or nothing. Finally I just ended up doing something I hate and showed up at his house for MY things. I got the attitude and the words to go with it. I really didn't want to go into the whole tirade but he kept pushing. I didn't get too upset, although a little. I was madder than ever that it had to come to this. The end result is that I am not ready to deal with this sort of stuff in my life right now. I have way too many other things going on right now. My friends here say, he'll call in a week or two when things cool down. Yeah, well we'll see and to be honest I am not sure I want to speak with him. It seems I have a knack of getting these phone calls from ex's quite frequently. Why? I have no idea but I think it's because deep down I always search for good in people and I never leave the people feeling any feelings of ill will. Who knows really though. Anyhow, today I start over. I have alot of work to accomplish at work, but that is not the only thing going on. Of course the ongoing care of the youngest. Tomorrow he is able to start putting a little weight on the leg so getting around should be a bit easier. I know he is looking forward to being more independent again!

My oldest son's gf is coming home tomorrow night also, 2 long months away and he is very happy she is finally coming home! He's been great about it, a little shaky at the start but overall very patient....I think that is very commendable!

So again, I'm off to work, tonight the Y and working on the issues with the wrist. I will succeed to get this back on track and getting myself well again.

Middle of the week, middle of the road

That is where I stand. I am really ramping up alot at the gym, found someone who is willing to help me strengthen this wrist of mine without me coming home and being in agony for hours after my workout. I am really excited about a new program I purchased last night too, for those days when I just can't quite to get my butt out the door to the gym! I have found my long lost love of exercise. We were almost like two friends who parted ways a while ago when I got hurt but have recently rekindled our friendship and for this I am happy!

DS2 is recouping, finally starting to put a little weight on that foot, unfortunately he realized last night that the cast will probably come off around the time that school starts :( Poor baby, but they are the daredevils and sometimes this is what happens.

I am off to the beach this weekend, with the wobbly ds2 in tow too, I need some R&R and away from all that has been my life around here so we are going. I am looking forward to those walks on the beach at sunrise that I missed with the girls and such. I just need some downtime and that is what we are going to do!

Other than that we are in the midst of summer, it's glorious and I definitely thrive in this weather, I probably should consider moving so that I may have this year round, but I am not sure I am ready for all of that yet, it's a thought though that keeps popping up in my head. The biggest con to this is I would miss the seasons and I truly love fall as much as I love summer!

So off to work, another productive day ahead of me and I need to get moving..

ciao

Tuesdays

Back at work, yesterday was exhausting, but I did go to the gym and work out. Where did that leave me? Exhausted last night, I could barely keep my eyes open and was out like a light by 9pm..lol I did have a great workout, trying to figure out how to get the upper body workouts back on rhythm. Ever since my fall in Dec, I've struggled with any weight I put on the right wrist. Of course the doc says I need it rebroken and then allow it to heal properly...eww and I didn't want to do that during the summer.

I am trudging along with my personal life, he did text me yesterday and we talked a bit at lunch, but I really don't feel any differently, I was able to put out there how I felt and where I was coming from during the day on Sat, did it make a difference? Who knows, because I totally put the ball back in his court! I am not contacting him, again if he continues to just be aloof I am going to make arrangements to get my things and move on. I think I should probably just make that my plan, because I almost wonder if there is anything left there for us to fight for? Some say yes, some say maybe, some say no...so the jury's out on that all around!!! lol

The boy is healing, uncomfortable but healing...hopefully he'll be able to start getting around a bit more soon.....we go back to the doc on Friday to see how he is making out!!

Off to work, another day another dollar! geez do I really make that much every day?? LOL

A long week

This has probably been the longest week so far...we took ds2 to get his cast changed on Tuesday. Evidently he had an infection and they immediately put him on antibiotics so we spent yet another night and the next day in the hospital dealing with all this...he's home (well if you consider grandma's) home and he is uncasted and getting cleaned and dealing with all of this.....

He had no clue he was having any problems and well, to be honest I'm not sure how he would considering they had him so doped up, anywho, we are on the road to recovery. Tomorrow we go in to hopefully have the recast done. I'm hoping it will be the case, he is responding great to the antibiotics and cleaning and well it's just a huge pain in the ass at this point in his point of view and mine also! Not what either of us expected at this long weekend of celebration, but it is what it is...lol

So we are here at mom's, not exactly the place I want to be, but it is what it is and I will make the best of it. Tomorrow, we go and hopefully get cast and home! I miss home and my bed as I am sure he does too! So much for our plans.....next year hopefully will be a more memorable 4th!!!

Best laid plans turn to mush......

So Thursday night I am getting ready to walk out the door to M's but first have to take ds2 to mom's. He's outside skateboarding, doing all those fancy tricks he sees on tv, videos, whatever...next thing I hear is this blood curdling scream, it literally made my blood run cold. I run out the back door and there he is lying 1/2 on the sidewalk, 1/2 in the street, but the thing that worried me the most was the bone protruding from his ankle. There is no way I can get him up and in the car and of course I didn't want him to realize what had happened, he was just laying there sobbing. So I told him to just stay put, DO NOT MOVE and keep your head down, I need to get something. I ran into the house and called 911 for an ambulance and then M to let him know what is going on. Well, M said call back 911 and cancel that (no need for that bill) and he came over and got ds2 in the truck and off to the hospital we went. After hours of what seemed like waiting, but really it was xrays and whatnot, they decided to stabilize him and get some of the swelling down before they have to go in and put in pins and whatnot...poor baby, now for him the summer is done. He's right now home with me and mom, we headed up to mom's because I can't lift him by myself and my oldest is working all weekend. So yesterday was a chore, it was hard to get him to the bathroom and such.....anyhow long story short, tomorrow we go home, I'm tired, but Mom and T are at the house today, so mom and M decided to get me out of the house. They agreed yesterday and M, me and two friends are headed down the shore for the day. I don't always get along w/my mom but she suprised me this time and for that I am grateful! So, I will be leaving shortly to scoot down to M's and off we go, I hope it's a good day, but at least ds2 is in good hands today and I will get one beach day in. Unfortunately, also this was our weekend at the beach with the gf's and of course I had to cancel that :(

So, I need to find something to wear, and get my hair done and off I go.....

Oh and the sun is out, finally! After a 94 degree day yesterday I would say summer has hit us hard, thank goodness for mom's pool yesterday too, as ds2 and I were able to spend a lot of time outside of course him in the shade but it was better than being cooped up in the house all day watching tv. Poor boy :(

I am so glad it's Friday....

you have no idea. After another trying day yesterday, I came home after stopping at bank, made a quick pot of spaghetti for the boys, ate a small salad and headed up to bed. Yes, 6:30pm and I was in bed and asleep at 7pm. I slept straight through until 10:30 and then was up for about 1/2 hour and fell promptly back asleep. M called around midnight and we talked until about 1:30 and I fell back asleep but finally woke up this a.m. well slept and refreshed for the first time in days! My oldest took care of his brother running him between his friends and gf's house which was great, he made sure the house stayed quiet for me, cleaned up the dinner dishes and the family room too (I need to write that down it's a first in a long time).

It's been raining here for 10 days straight, but today? SUN!! I am so excited it's not even funny..lol My guy is home tomorrow night, I can't wait to see him and a quiet evening is planned with a nice dinner and just us time!

I have one more day of craziness at work, then I have a weekend to recoup and regroup. Things are certainly changing there and it's not always been easy!

Off to the races....

Friday and still counting....

I wish it were next Friday, but alas I still a little over a week to go. I did not get much done yesterday, so if I go to the beach, it will be for the day. I have alot to do here at home, but this weather is not cooperating with me. I still am feeling pretty icky with this cold. None stop sneezing and the cough. I hate allergies! They seem to exasperate the whole cold.

Had a great date last night, and I am truly grateful for him working all this out so we can talk/see each other live every other night. And for being such a dear as to move it up (time zone difference) since I have not been feeling well.

Today, back at work. blah I have not been in a working mood, although I am getting quite a bit done at work. I'm glad it's the weekend and I need some down time. Some rest to shake this cold once and for all.

The boy is enjoying his first full week of summer vacation. Unfortunately his gf's step mom is making it very hard on them both to see each other. Some people I just never get, there is nothing wrong with them hanging out, and they are kids the should be able to enjoy themselves. His other friends have pretty much been here non stop, I love the house full of kids, but sometimes too I need a break.

The older boy is missing his gf too! She is overseas visiting her dad, home July 10th, so his eye is on the prize and he has quite a bit longer than me to wait. I have enjoyed his company at home lately though :) He also wants to get back into school full time at U of De. I hope he can figure out a way to do this, but then I will have to buy his car from him. I am glad I didn't go out and buy my own, because then it wouldn't happen, of course his is a nice little car, so I don't mind.

Exercise, I have all but given up on it the past few days, I have had no energy to put forth any effort. Hopefully soon, when I start feeling a wee bit better.

The weekend is here! enjoy

He did it!!!

Yes, 8th grade is a really big deal now. They are entering into uncharted territory called high school next year. It was a great day, I had a tear in my eye and a smile on my face.....

The middle of the long weekend

Woke up really early today, was able to get alot accomplished already since the oldest is working and the youngest is at a sleepover. The weather has been just perfect for this long holiday weekend, which is quite opposite of the norm for this holiday weekend. I need to get out and cut the grass, but I have no motivation right this moment so I thought I would pop in here! I have not gone anywhere or really made any plans as my June is going to be quite busy on most weekends, so mostly housework, working on my garden (I'm building up my backyard one) and just general hanging out and enjoying the down time.

School is almost over for the year for the youngest, graduating 8th grade in a few weeks and then he has his summer. I've noticed over the past month that he has contacted his father less and less. I'm sure partly is from the outcome of the custody battle that I won (which excludes his father from any custody) and his constant lying to the boy about what happened and why. It reall is a sad thing.

As for S and I, well we've had quite a long stretch now where we haven't seen one another. We worked through the issues of this, although maybe I'm not quite sure it's over (the issues that is), he is coming up the weekend of the 5th and I can say honestly I'm very glad he is. Although in the back of my mind I always wonder. We are heading down to Baltimore for this visit, another great city which he has never been to.

As for me, well I'm down 5 lb, been working out more, walking alot and just taking care of me! I'm officially 2 1/2 years out now and while it's not always easy, it is the path I've chosen. I think that my life would have been stuck in the same revolving pattern of discontent had I not chosen to do this. My health and wellbeing are intact and the head does seem to finally catch up with the rest of it, eventually. But I can honestly say some days I'm still a little taken aback by the changes that I've gone through.

Ok, before it gets too hot, I'm off to cut the lawn, good exercise!!

Enjoy the holiday and remember what this is about, those who fight or have fought for our country, the ones who take the lead and take care of us when the world is not quite right!

It's Saturday

Today I think turned out alot better than the weather people led us to believe. I got the grass cut, some weeding and other yard work done. Pedicure after, and I felt lovely!! The gym sent out their summer bulletin and YEAH the pool opens Sat for the summer season (sorry my Aussie friends :( ) anyhow, I know I will get alot of swimming in this summer. I got my yoga done, wash is almost done, and I feel well accomplished today!! that is a good thing!

Tomorrow we are off, the second sons first concert! I'm excited to take him to it and his gf. We will see the following bands, ZZTop, Saliva, Unloaded, Puddle of Mudd, Offspring, Hailstorm ( a local band) and Papa Roach. For a first concert it should be a mind blowing event for the youngster, of course I'm only interested in really only two of the bands!!! lol

I am glad I will be able to share this with him. When I was thinking back about my first concert, my dad took me to see Aerosmith, 78, awesome and yes I was the same age as my youngest...so that is cool!!!

Anyhow, my weekend is going along perfectly a nice night for some fun with family (my oldest is home for the next six weeks or so) and friends...which I will be meeting out later tonight for some dancing and fun!!! I hope you all are having a great weekend!

Beautiful Sunday

I had a nice Sunday, slept in (in fact did both Sat and Sun) which is unprecedented for me, I guess I am learning to relax and enjoy again. Of course the late nights helped too :)

Had a nice Mother's Day, the youngest cooked dinner, got me a beautiful hanging basket and we just spent a quiet day at home. I was given a memories rosebush also which I transplanted later in the day and spread some mulch. Overall not a stressful day at all. The oldest came home bearing a card (cute) and sunburn (ouch). He informed me the gifts come tonight. He is also taking us to see the new Star Trek movie tonight also!

Am trying to plan another adventure to NYC for the end of the month. The list of things to do and see is longer than the time we have alloted so I had to send an email and ask which is a must do for this trip and what can wait until another time! lol Hopefully enough can be striked and still be ok for this time....

Off to get ready to go to work, back to the grind so to speak.....

Yeah

It's the weekend, will be lowkey at home and enjoying time with at least one of the two boys. Seems the other has made other plans as he is evolving into manhood and has made other plans for Sunday...we'll see if he remembers that it's Mother's Day. Of course, he has always been a good son when it comes to occasions such as this.

S and I had another talk tonight, a good talk, so to say we are on a three year plan. 3 years being when my youngest graduates high school and will be intact with friends and such and then I can think more (well a little) about me...sounds selfish but it's a reality, I will always put my children first and to find someone who understands this is a very good thing. So I guess I will miss him alot during these three years but knowing there is an end in sight is more than anything else right now. I have had opportunities for more dates from here but seriously in the past month or so when I have taken them up on it, I always feel it's not right so that is telling me that S is right...I know three years sounds like alot of time, but the things we can do and the time we spend is more special and we truly will be taking it slow but in the long run I think this is a good thing!

So hopefully tomorrow it won't rain and I can cut my jungle of a lawn and get some flowers transplanted, other than that it appears it will be a low key weekend, which is not such a bad thing......

Today was just as challenging as yesterday

I just hope the doom and gloom that is my life lifts soon. I really am not liking the person I have been the past few days. What has brought this on, probably quite a few things, like the ex in town and driving me nuts; work being absolutely ridiculous about some things and then when in meeting after meeting they can't understand why nothing is getting done; the weather (enough said on that one); my emotional well being with my son right (but that will change once the ex is gone); the weather (ok the lack of sun is really getting me down); my finances; ok the list goes on and on and of course I could write a novel 400+ pages on this but I am going to stop right now.

So I went and got some artificial sun tonight (tanning), I talked to S shortly (there is another story behind that one), I made a great dinner for me the boy and his gf, and I finished the laundry that was building up. I want to have a drink and there is none in the house, so that is a VERY good thing right now because I'm too lazy to go out for one!!

I need to find some things around the house to distract me, again I'm thinking I should move out of this pot known as my home because it sux all the extra money I save just to keep up with it, but not sure that would cure my financial situation. I want a vacation (ok I know I had quite a few this year already) and I need some change in my life, something to look forward to again...

So with that I'm off to figure out some things and ponder my life, or read a book and fall asleep which ever comes first! HA HA

Weekend and a start of a trying week

The weekend was good when I finally got moving in a forward destination. My plane was delayed 3 1/2 hours on Friday which led to a dinner cancellation and one very tired and worn out girl upon arrival. Luckily we found Chili's open and had a quick bite to eat at 11:30 pm, I was exhausted. I slept in on Saturday morning as we were only venturing down to Fort Worth for the day, so it was a lazy get ready when I feel like moving type of day. We had fun, although a huge thunderstorm came rolling in while we were there. That night we were able to get our dinner in and it was delicious!!!

Also, I got a chance to go to a new grocery store, Central Market. Oh how I wish there were some of these up here! I was like a kid in a candy store in there, it was absolutely amazing. I can't wait for my next trip down to visit again!!

Came home on time but to be awoken early in the morning on Monday with a mind bending migraine. I believe this is my third that has required me out of work for a day so the next one will require a call to the doctor for a med check on that one. Back to work today and a not so friendly visit to court to followup on my petition for full custody, it was a good news/bad news type of day. Good news - custody awarded Bad news - all back child support owed was dropped FOREVER! I knew not to count on it but geez.

So the ex came up for this grand event, he agreed in front of the judge to relinquish all rights, what type of person does this and the better question at this point is how could I have ever been married to this type of person. It makes me sad to realize that I never really knew what he was capable of. Amazingly so, it's a relief to be rid of him once and for all.....so another emotional trying day and a new beginning again for me.

A great weekend

Spent the weekend down at the beach....yes with no regard for my eating, but pleasantly (and obviously still surprised) when the scale reports no gain.

Here are a few snaps, it's was almost 80 and well the wind cooperated being off the land not the ocean, so it was glorious! Here is the youngest and his gf.....nice kids! lol

Yes, people ventured out onto the beach, in fact the beach was packed with sunbathers, and a few brave ones got into the water, I bet it's about 50 degrees....brrr

As for me, well shorts and a tshirt were fine for the weather, I did get quite a bit sun and of course was not thinking about it, so I am red...

Today, rain and chilly back in the 50's......

Birthdays and other assorted things

This weekend we are beach bound, the boy, dog and myself. I can't wait, the weather has broken and it's going to be an excellent weekend to hang at the shore.

Two weeks from tonight I will be celebrating some bday's with my guy. So the cards are starting to fall, we are really happy together and there is talk of me moving!! YIKES!!! TX is a big state when I live in the second smallest...

I got my first pedicure of the season....gosh my toes feel like heaven on earth!! lol

The boy is bringing a gf to the beach!! geez my baby is growing up...yes this is the youngest.

I am busy at work, and they are hinting around to see if I will be leaving soon? I guess all the trips to TX are adding up to a move for me, well that may be true, I'll know more after the next trip. While I love my life here it is stagnant....devoid of meaning and depth so maybe it will happen, who knows.

I have had a few dates up here but each time I go out I feel guilty, because I want it to be S...so I guess what Janine said is true...when am I moving to TX...lol I guess only time will tell...

Until then I am going to enjoy the weekend and have a drink with my new neighbor....and then off to the beach we are tomorrow!!

Enjoy

Wii

The boys have been requesting lately that I purchase yet another game system, the Wii. While I would love to have the Wii fit, I will secretly never tell them this. So my oldest approached me once again, via text message. I would love to have the Wii and get a Wii Fit, mom I know you would love to use it also. So I did some careful research on the net today, and while, yes I would love to have a Wii, I'm not ready to shell the out the cash investment for yet another game system in this house. Will I really love the Wii Fit as everyone raves, I do love to workout, do the yoga and get my body in whatever shape it feels is best! But seriously, we have quite a few game systems now! Probably everyone on the market! So I made my son a proposition, if I buy the Wii, he has the purchase at the same time and place the Wii fit, that way they will get their system and I get my Wii fit!! ingenous, probably not, but now he has to think about it! lol

Saturday

I spent today at the shore, I drove down this a.m. after dropping off my son for his field trip to Philly. It was glorious but a bit windy. Temps probably 65 - 70 but geez the wind at some times was gusting up to 40 mph. I had a great day, I got a coffee and got some great pics (which I will post soon) on the beach walked up and down one time, then did some light shopping taking advantage of the 75% off from last years fashions...and got ds2 some caramel popcorn before my ride home. Upon returning home I offered to take gf and ds2 to the movies and we saw The Knowing. Not bad, not the greatest movie we've seen but not the worst either. It was nice to be out with the kids..

DS2 is dealing once again with some emotional issues. I wish I could help him through it, we sat and had a long talk tonight, but I know there is more to it than what he is sharing and it kills me. I hear the sadness in his voice but don't know how to help him. Lots of hugs and love is what I am currently giving, hopefully today was just a little bit of a down day for him, it worries me :(

I am back on track with my exercise big time, I'm so proud of myself and the inspirations out there...it's nice to read about their accomplishments and I too want to be someone like that! I did get in the pool last night and did some laps, not as many as I used to do, but hey it's a start right!!

I'm glad spring is here and well tomorrow is supposed to be a better day weather wise than today!! yeah